More Cheese More Chocolate

Hello, world! Remember me? I know I haven’t been around much lately, but I have been a little busy. It all started with a cleaning binge I went on immediately upon my return to Mini Soda last week. The result was a much improved state of my kitchen, bathroom and bedroom, but it was exhausting and the last thing I wanted to do afterward was make my kitchen messy again by cooking a big meal in it.

The cleaning binge was followed by another kind of binge that tends to happen when 30 twenty-somethings are hanging out in a gigantic house in northern Minnesota in the dead of winter. Snowmobilers, ice fishermen, bikini contest participants and law students are the only people dumb enough to go up north in January. One of those groups is also dumb enough to spend hours in an outdoor hot tub with only a few walls and screens to protect them from the subzero temperatures. I’ll give you a hint: it’s not the bikini contest participants.

The point is I’ve been a little preoccupied and I’ve spent virtually no time in the the kitchen unless I was throwing together a sandwich or making a bloody mary. Fortunately I have a few things left over from my time in Iowa that I haven’t posted, including this recipe for toffee. I’ve posted before about Saltine Toffee, which I still think is a fine alternative to the real thing. The real thing is incredibly easy to make, though, so why not try it out?

Just like the caramel recipe I recently posted, this toffee recipe comes from Old Fashioned Candy Recipes from Bear Wallow Books.

I’m going to let you guys in on a little secret. You know those people who go around talking about how difficult candy-making is? They are liars. Terrible, terrible liars. On the spectrum of liars I would put them closer to the I-did-not-inhale liars than the Iraq-has-weapons-of-mass-destruction liars, but they are still liars. Making candy is insanely easy. I’m talking Tiger Woods easy. Candy-making is so easy you could do it in a Perkins parking lot (provided you had a hot plate). If you can read a recipe, read a thermometer and stir a sugary mixture for about 20 minutes, then you can make candy. Congratulations!

The caramel recipe I used came from an old candy cookbook that my mom dug up from the depths of the basement. I forget the name of the book, or perhaps more accurately the pamphlet, but I don’t think it’s something that you could find on Amazon or anything so the title would not be of much help to you. Scratch that! I think I found it. Old Fashioned Candy Recipes from Bear Wallow Books. Hurry up and order your copy today – only 13 remain!

Technically these are called “Butter Caramels,” but the honey gives them serious honey undertones so I renamed them. It could have just been the honey that I used and a lighter variety might result in a more buttery candy. Either way, honey-hinted caramels are nothing to complain about.

One cup cream, 1 cup sugar, 1/4 cup honey, 1 tsp vanilla, 2 tbsp butter, and 1/8 tsp salt. Unless you’re diabetic you cannot go wrong with this combination.

It’s helpful to have the ingredients measured out beforehand in candy-making because things will happen fast. You don’t want to end up with a pan of burnt sugar because you waited until the last second to measure a teaspoon of vanilla.

Along with measuring out the ingredients, grease an 8×8″ pan before you start cooking.

Bring the cream to a boil in a saucepan. Yes, I realize there is no boiling going on in this picture.

Add in the sugar and honey return it to a boil. Continue cooking until the temperature reaches 275. It will take several minutes to heat all the way, but keep stirring the mixture so it doesn’t burn. It’s also important to use either a wooden spoon or a utensil that can handle high heat unless you don’t mind ingesting melted plastic.

Once the mixture hits 275 remove it from the heat and add the vanilla, butter, and salt. Stir to combine and pour the caramel into the prepared pan.

I sprinkled some of the caramel with grey sea salt while it was still warm. Salted caramel. Yum.

Wait at least a few hours before slicing the caramel.

I wrapped each piece in wax paper to make cute little bundles and to prevent sticking. It’s a bit of a pain to individually wrap them but worth it to not end up with a big blob of caramel.